30 WAYS YOU’RE NOT ENOUGH (OR ELSE YOU’RE TOO MUCH BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, THE WOMAN THING)
“There is always an excuse masquerading as a reason given for a woman about why she’s not quite right for any role,”
says Leanne Dzubinski PhD, talking about the updated research she’s undertaken with Amy Diehl, PhD and Amber Stephenson and published in the peer-reviewed Human Resource Development Quarterly.
The research indicates 30 types of personal identity factors used to discriminate against women leaders.
As women, we’re excluded from promotion because we’re too young and inexperienced… or because we’re too old and overqualified.
We have children so we can’t be relied upon. Or we don’t have children, so we’re not warm and approachable.
We have the wrong accent or the wrong body size or the wrong coloured skin or the wrong marital status or the wrong sexual orientation.
We’re too bossy. Or not assertive enough.
We’re too rigid. Or too flexible. Too wishy-washy.
Too available? Too unavailable?
Too loud? Too invisible?
Too grim? Too friendly?
Too busy for coffee meetings? Too lacking in networks?
Research suggests practically ANY personal characteristic can be proclaimed problematic for a woman leader, to question her competence and suitability for leadership. And women can be as judgemental of other women as men are.
“It used to be the argument that as soon as you get more women in, it would fix itself — it’s not fixing itself,” says Dr Dzubinski.
That’s partly because women have grown up in a sexist world and internalised the sexism, and partly because women observe only a few places made available at tables for women and assume the only way to ascend into a leadership role is if another woman loses her spot.
Whichever “too” you’ve been told you are, chances are if you’re a woman in leadership, you’ve been told you have the problem or you are the problem. This research tells us you haven’t and you’re not.
But having been told this so often and for so long, it could be hard for you to shift that belief, and hard to make the difference you want to make in a world that tells you you’re either “too” or “not enough”. No wonder imposter syndrome runs rampant among highly-competent, high-achieving executive women leaders!
There are some terrific tools and strategies available to help, and I’d love to share them with you. If you’d like to explore how we can work together to unpack some of this gaslighting and have you stand more powerfully in just how good you are, book a call with me.
Every good wish,
Karyn
